Tag Archives: home

Wishcast Wednesday – What do you wish for your home?

Talk about synchonicity!

It’s been a few weeks since I posted.  I have been going through a bit of deep contemplation and change but had nothing much I wanted to really post about.  I had already decided that I would post this week for Wishcast Wednesday when I received a post from my friend and inspiration Andrea from ABC Creativity.  Her post so inspired me that I responded to her post and thanked her:
Thanks for this post! There are several things you said that really struck me (inspired me).
 
1. “I’m not interested in living an “ordinary life” and I sure didn’t want an “ordinary” house.”  – So often I look around my house and it doesn’t reflect who I really am–there’s only one room in my house that does and that’s my bedroom–because I decorated in colors, textures, and items I LOVE. I am going to take more time and reflect on who I actually am as I continue to redo my house in my own “authentic style”! — you know this is something I have been working towards for years, and I AM getting there–this is just a huge great reminder.
2. “I wanted a house that would nurture me and my creative dreams.”    – I’m more in that space now than ever before and, as above, am working on making sure I have creative space that inspires me.
3. “If you want more of something in your life – you have to make space for it. In your home or your calendar or your thoughts or your heart–somewhere you’ve got to make space for it.”    – YES!!! Thank you for that glorious reminder!!
 
As I start getting ready to write here about Andrea’s post and her inspiration when my e-mail pops up with an e-mail from Jamie and her question this week is…

 What do you wish for your home? 

 Almost as if Andrea and Jamie were talking–but definately on the same wavelength!!

 So, in addition to the above, I wish for my home to (and it already does a lot of these):
 
– Welcome me when I come home, to envelope me in it’s warmth and comfort.
– Inspire me, motivate me when needed.
– Provide a place of rest and rebuilding when life gets tough.  A lifting off spot for me.
– Show who Ceanne really is, so that when anyone walks in they “get” that this is my home.
– That others are comfortable and feel at ease and welcome.
– Julie Jordon Scott talked once about how she has quotes on her front door – I have that on my creativity “to do” list as something I’ll be doing this summer.
– I think I may take some of Andrea’s inspiration and do some creative art work right on my walls.  I actually have recurring dreams where I do that–perhaps Spirit has been trying to talk to me!
 
When you learn to love and let yourself be loved, you come home to the hearth of your spirit.  You are warm and sheltered.  You are completely at one in the house of your own longing and belonging.  – John O’Donahue
Prayer and housekeeping–they go together.  They have always gone together.  We simply know that our daily round is how we live.  When we clean and order our homes, we are somehow cleaning and ordering ourselves.  – Gunilla Norris

Here is everything I’ve cherished;
That these walls should glow with beauty,
Spurred my lagging soul to duty;
That there should be gladness here,
Kept me toiling, year by year…
Every thought and every act,
Were to keep this home intact.
– Edgar A. Guest

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Home

I was reading through some of my old journals the other day–trying to find a quote by Mary J. Blige that I had written down – “I blame my mother for nothing, but I forgive her everything.” I might write about that quote another time but today I thought I’d share something I wrote about “Home” from January, 2002, shortly after I purchased my first house by myself. It is mostly about my first house that I purchased with my partner at the time–in 1993.

Home – In every place I have lived I have always tried to create a home–a place where I could relax fully, where I was surrounded by things I love (heirlooms, pets, people, things I think are beautiful or useful). A place where I could be happy just being me. A place where others could be comfortable too. My first house, I loved because it was my only place–it had all of my worldly goods in it and all of my love went in it. I tried to make it comfortable–and it was.

I loved just sitting and staring out the window into the trees, watching the blue jays at the feeder and listening to their squeak (one of my favorite sounds). I loved the view from my kitchen window of the Cape Breton Highlands and St. Anne’s Bay. On foggy days I felt like I was in the world alone and I was both afraid and intrigued by that feeling.

I loved to watch Cochise (my Chesapeake Bay Retriever who passed away shortly before I left) saunter past me, looking at me, with a shoe in his mouth knowing he was trying to get my attention–he knew he was not supposed to have shoes in his mouth. I loved waking up with Tinka (my cat at the time) sleeping on my hip.

It was a good home and I have a lot of good memories there. I try to keep those foremost in my mind because that haven was also a little bit of hell to me. When Jim was around, I felt trapped and uncomfortable. I never knew what would set him off or when he would yell at me, or for what. It could be months of fun and laughter and love and then one day, one moment, could cloud my life so completely that I felt I couldn’t breathe. After a while, I realized I was more tied to the house (my home) that to Jim but I could not leave my life there. It was a place of infinite peace when he was not around. Finally, I knew the only way I was ever going to be free of him was to leave my home. I had to leave my home first before I could leave Jim–within two months I was strong enough to do so.

I think of that house a lot. I miss it still. I had a lot of firsts there. And of course the beautiful scenery of the Canadian East Coast–Englishtown, Nova Scotia. Thankfully I have pictures and my memories.

The most important thing about having a home is having a safe haven. That’s what I’m trying to create for myself in this home. I may hot have the beautiful scenery of Cape Breton (I moved back to my home province of Manitoba) but I can create a beautiful landscape–a place I can take pride in because I have created and am creating a home for myself where there is no one who can make me feel trapped or scared again.

And I don’t have to leave this place unless I want to.

When I read this, it struck me for a few reasons–first of all, I didn’t even realize it was my writing until I got to the part about Cape Breton. Secondly, is that I still am working on creating that safe haven for myself in my home, but more importantly in myself.

That safe haven can’t be hurt or scared unless I chose–and I don’t for the most part. I still have a way to go, but I’m still going forward. And, no matter where I am, I will create home.

Here’s some beautiful pictures of Cape Breton and Nova Scotia. If you ever get a chance to visit there, I highly recommend it. You will find some of the most beautiful scenery in the world (yes, that’s right…the world!!) and the most friendly people ever!

C.

Wishcast Wednesday – What do you wish for your space?

Wednesday again, and the Wishcast question for May 26th is “What do you wish for your space?” (I’m a week late as I was off work sick all of last week and barely moved from my bed or couch).

This is an easy question for me to answer as I found the answer a couple of years ago.

I wish my space to be decorated in a way that shows my authentic style, and it has to be relaxing and comfortable. I want it to “say”, “yes” to me when I see it. For me to feel enveloped. My sanctuary.

At the time that I realized this is what I want for my space, I was taking a course with a friend from my Spiritual home–her site is here ABC Creativity, and she’s fabulous! We were doing some goal setting around some specific topics and one of the topics was “Home”. And in doing the exercise, it came to me “I want my space decorated in my authentic style”–as I had been using hand me down furniture, light-colored paint, “it’ll do” type of “decorating” for so long that I did not feel any inspiration or real sense of comfort in my home. I had barely put pictures on the wall even after living in my house for 6+ years. I guess I got in a rut of waiting to be living in my “perfect” house. The only room in the house that reflected me was my bedroom.

While take the course with Andrea, I realized that I didn’t have to wait–I could make my current house as perfect as I could.

What started me thinking was Andrea asked me “What is your authentic style?” And I responded, “I don’t know”.

I thought that my “authentic” style would encompass light and light reflecting but neutral colors–maybe kind of beachy/cottagey–and I still do love that style (I just recently redid my basement and downstairs half bath in that style). But the first room I redid after my realization was my living room and it’s actually done in a dark curry color on the walls (who knew that was coming?), with heavy dark sage drapes, dark wooden furniture accessories, large seating furniture, large colorful wall art, etc.–and I love it! It’s completely different from anything I’ve done anyplace I’ve ever lived. I call it “South African Plantation–1800’s”, I’m not sure why. I hope to bring that kind of “old world” style into the rest of my mail floor and slowly transition into a lighter color theme as I go into second floor where my bedroom, study, and office/craft rooms are. The second floor I wish to be peaceful, relaxing, and yet inspiring–and that’s the scheme that’s slowly developing as well.

My outside home work space (cubicle), however, has colorful posters, inspirational messages, and pictures of my pets–I guess because I can’t do anything about the color of the cubicle walls which are a neutral “cafe au lait”.

Have a great week!!!

On a clear day you can see for miles and miles…

Love the lyrics…wish I could remember the name of the song.

Life continues to be busy for me–I realize, of course, that I make it so. I am setting up positive boundaries for myself and am trying to reduce–my girth and the amount of unnecessary possessions in my house. I think there’s a book about that–“Does this clutter make my butt look big?” It’s not that I have a lot of clutter, but I realize that when I purchased this house almost 9 years ago I really had very little in it. I had just moved out of my brother’s house where I rented a bedroom, and had previously just split up from my ex where I had left most of my worldly possessions with him.

I have tried to fill my house with “stuff” and things to make me busy and projects, and, and, and… I’ve come to slowly realize that there are things in my house that I do not need–or really want for that matter–so I’m slowly going through the areas/rooms of my home and reducing. This is actually a continuation that I have done before, but now it’s just making more sense. I live in a 3 bedroom house with 2 floors and a basement, but it seems small. It’s not really big either, but for 1 person and and a couple of small animals??? It really is about the right size–as long as I continue to reduce the amount of “stuff” I have in it.

I have created a “cave”, a place to go hide from the world. Again, this is not a new realization–it’s just becoming more and more clear to me what I’ve done. Now, I’m not talking about giving up my house/home, I’m just talking about making it more “me”.

I guess for a long time I really didn’t feel I knew who “me” is. And that’s its own journey that feels more clear too–even though I think I’ve got miles and miles to go for that clarity.

Another thing that’s been happening is that I have this feeling of my “old” life and my current life converging/colliding. I’m seeing it happen through Facebook. I am seeing that people from my current life/Spiritual home are “friends” with others from a life I led a lifetime ago–a time that feels a world away from who I am now. I’m finding I’m having some feelings that I’m really not too sure what to do with. I’m the not the person I was and I wasn’t the person I am–I often feel like I have lived two different lives. And never the two shall meet, or will they? Or should they? Maybe they should?

There are some things from the person I was “then” that I miss–spontaneity, fun-loving, passionate, loving, forgiving, seemingly fearless, the size of my butt (it was big then too–at least I thought so then–but I just didn’t appreciate how I looked–silly girl), hopeful, dreamy, . And there are things that, until very recently, I wished away. I have carried guilt, shame, and anger from that time in my life to now. And now, there is so much about myself that I love–intelligence, logic, openness, love, acceptance, connection to Spirit, but the size of my butt has really gotten out of hand!

Maybe…and this is just a new thought to me–which may be totally obvious to others but…Maybe…the “best” me is those two “worlds” combined. Maybe that’s part of creating my best life???